Perception Of Energy

Last night, typical salvia experience, 100X. Typical, but I recall it very well, which is not typical. The more I do this, the better I become at recall.

I inhaled my last hit of salvia and felt that it would be a strong experience, felt the dizzying rush hit me, and suppressed it long enough to get into bed next to my sleeping wife, got into a comfortable upright crossed-legs sitting position, then allowed it to take full effect.

Instantly I sensed my wife's body heat both physically and visually, actually seeing it as a glow and feeling it on my skin as if it were sunlight. It was as if when I allowed the salvia to take effect, someone had thrown a switch and she lit up like a weak fluorescent tube. My body stopped feeling like a body. It felt like I was made of a cloud of sparkling energy, like static on an old television set only three-dimensional. My senses were hyper-attuned.

Looking more-or-less at a point on the wall in front of me, I felt my face dissolve in a cloud of static and saw the wall with my entire facial area as if it were one huge eye. Then the room around me, my whole panoramic view of it, seemed to become a solid thing intersecting with my head, like a solid but transparent cone with it's apex anchored at the very back of my head, interpenetrating my flesh. I could physically feel it as a solid, feel it interpenetrating my facial area and the interior of my head.

My entire reality took on an illusory quality, not unreal or cartoonish but more like a projection, and this included my head and body, so they blended into one continuous static-like sparkling energy field. My point-of-view had also shifted; instead of being "pressed up against the window of my eyes" as it usually is, it receded as if I'd taken a few steps back from that window toward the back of my head. My peripheral vision became clearer and eventually very sharp, though not as sharp as my normal focal point vision is; still, much sharper than normal peripheral vision. I still seemed to be viewing the world through my whole facial area.

Slightly glowing green shapes filled the room, moving about, sometimes intersecting with parts of my body or passing through my head. I could feel them as they touched me, and indeed I could feel them inside of me as they passed through me. At first they moved about randomly but after a few minutes I realized that I could control their motion to some extent, and practiced doing so. It was somewhat difficult. Twice a green shape passed through my torso and through my heart, and each time as it did my heart skipped one short beat, as if it felt it, which it indeed seemed to.

Then out of the corner of my eye to my right as I looked straight ahead, beyond my wife's sleeping body I saw an arm rise up and move about. I could also see it's shadow on the opposite wall to my left, since the light source in the room was a lamp on the dresser to the right of the bed. I turned my head and noted that it had seemed to be my wife's arm that had momentarily moved upwards in her sleep, so I dismissed it as that and re-directed my eyes forward. Then I once again noted the arm moving about, only this time I didn't look at it directly, observing it only through peripheral vision. This time it was definitely not my wife's arm. It grew longer, longer than an arm is supposed to be. It looked brownish and dessicated, slender, almost skeletal, with a claw-like hand. I realized that this should scare me but I seemed to have this machine-like dispassionate inner calm, and so I merely observed it flailing about for a short while, still casting its shadow. All I could muster in response was an attitude of a mixture of confidence, fascination and amusement. It went away.

Then I closed my eyes and started a one-point meditation. Gradually my state became trance-like and I saw and felt an area in front of me darken to deepest black, but a black sparkling with energy, a black field filled with effervescent sparks that seemed to have almost an electrical quality to it, as if it were the very archetype of energy itself. This black sparkling field grew to encompass my face, centered at a point between my eyes, or rather where my eyes should have been. My head was humming with energy. My entire body began to thrum with this vibratory energy as if I were tapping into it, and so I focused my mind on increasing it still more. The black field grew in size, and my head and body felt like strong electrical currents were running through them, albeit in a fairly pleasant manner. I felt like I was being charged like a battery.

In the past when I tried to raise energy like this it always affected my heart as if I were running or exercising, but this time it did not bother me in the least. I felt more and more of this pseudoelectrical energy running through me, originating at the point between my eyes where the blackness was, but I reached a point where no matter the effort that I put into it I could not increase it further, and so it gradually faded.

This latter part of the experience left me so charged with inner energy that it took me two hours to fall asleep afterwards.

All of these things except the spooky raised moving hand and arm I had seen many times before, but I've never been able to recall them precisely enough to write them down. I'm also sure that I saw and felt other things last night that I'm not recalling now.

Altogether a pleasant experience. Well, except the arm. After it was over I thought about that creepy arm moving about, and got a serious case of gooseflesh.